The Goal – Week 45

The Goal – Week 45



I got a glimpse of how easy it would be to quit.

Of course I have quit many attempts regarding weight loss many, many times in my life.  But this time is different.  Even with my slow progress, I must admit I’m a bit cocky about this process.  I just refuse to accept failure as an option.

So when I went out of town for a MUCH needed vacation with my husband, I wasn’t concerned in the least about my goal.  I have been a steady presence at the gym for 15 months.  I have gone on several vacations during that time.  I go.  I come back.  It’s never been an issue.

But this time I went.  I came home.  And I could not bring myself to go back to the gym.  The first day back I was like a jetlagged zombie.  I just wandered around the house attempting to unpack and re-acclimate myself to life. And that’s ok.  But day 2 dawned and  ya’ll…

I. Just. Could. Not.

I honestly have no idea why.

I had a great trip.  I won’t insult you by suggesting that I ate nothing but kale and unsalted almonds the whole week.  But I actually did pretty well.  And by ‘well’ I mean I wasn’t double dunking doughnuts in the 700 area Starbucks.  I take my victories where I can get them friends.

And I wasn’t dreading going back to the gym.  I didn’t actually even think about it.

Missing the first day was no big deal.  I’m a busy person.  I didn’t feel 100%.

Wanna know the scariest part?  Missing the second day was even easier.  I didn’t even feel the need for an excuse.

By the third day, something had to give.  I trudged through the house, retrieved my workout clothes (i.e pajamas)  and laced up my shoes.

I drove to the gym and developed a pounding headache.  It’s probably dangerous to get on the spin bike with a blinding migraine that might be a brain ailment, right? But I did.  And the pain just got worse for the next 50 minutes.  And when that workout was over, I still had a headache.  Apparently those mighty endorphins are not the miraculous things we were led to believe.  I’m convinced skipping the exercise wouldn’t have cured the headache either.  And if I had skipped class for the third time with no good excuse, how much easier would it be to skip the 4th or the 5th?  I am so thankful that my vacation from the gym was not permanent.

I see how it happens now.  Nobody plans to quit.  Nobody wakes up and says “Sure, I’ll keep paying for that membership for the next ten months but I am never going back.” Nobody buys an overpriced treadmill with the intention of using it for 6 weeks and then allowing it to fill them with guilt and shame for a year before finally sacrificing it to Craigslist.  Nobody does it on purpose.

They say (whoever ‘they’ are) that it takes 30 days to form a habit but I disagree.

I think it takes a lifetime. Because it’s only a habit until you stop doing it.

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