Bible Thursday – Matthew 10

“When people realize it is the living God you are presenting and not some idol that makes them feel good, they are going to turn on you, even people in your own family. There is a great irony here: proclaiming so much love, experiencing so much hate! But don’t quit. Don’t cave in. It is all well worth it in the end. It is not success you are after in such times but survival. Be survivors! Before you’ve run out of options, the Son of Man will have arrived.”

Matthew 10:21-23

 

The Goal – Week 48

The Goal – Week 48

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This year has been an amazing learning experience for me.  I wished I had learned some of this stuff earlier but that’s a statement that’s been true in my life for as long as I can remember.  Here’s the first thing:

41 year old Rachel is different from 30 year old Rachel.  I know it sounds nuts but I really believed that the weight loss approach that gave me great success 10 years ago would work the same today.  Even when my results said otherwise, I was undeterred.  I kept thinking I must not be trying hard enough.  You see I believed in my nutritional approach with an almost religious fervor.  The hard reality is that I am not the same. And while the core principles that I will cling to until they pry the coconut oil OUT OF MY COLD DEAD HANDS are still the foundation of my program, things had to be tweaked.  And I had to admit that I was wrong about a thing or seven (Lawdy I hate this!)  I’m actually thrilled that this happened though because I will be different at 51 and 61.  I’m playing a long game here friends.  When I finally hit that goal (It’s happening. Write it down.  Believe me or no.  It matters not.)  it will only be the first step on this journey.  People lose weight all the ding dong day.  Only 5% of those people keep it off.  I have to use this new insight to be part of that percentage.

 

 

The Goal – Week 47

The Goal – Week 47

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Change is not hard.

Waking up every day and doing something different from the day before is not really a big deal.  If you had eggs for breakfast yesterday and a doughnut omelet today, then that’s change.  I’m not suggesting it’s a good one but it counts.

It’s the day in and day out retention of a change you already made that’s difficult.

Change is easy.

Changing is hard.

The Goal – Week 45

The Goal – Week 45

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I got a glimpse of how easy it would be to quit.

Of course I have quit many attempts regarding weight loss many, many times in my life.  But this time is different.  Even with my slow progress, I must admit I’m a bit cocky about this process.  I just refuse to accept failure as an option.

So when I went out of town for a MUCH needed vacation with my husband, I wasn’t concerned in the least about my goal.  I have been a steady presence at the gym for 15 months.  I have gone on several vacations during that time.  I go.  I come back.  It’s never been an issue.

But this time I went.  I came home.  And I could not bring myself to go back to the gym.  The first day back I was like a jetlagged zombie.  I just wandered around the house attempting to unpack and re-acclimate myself to life. And that’s ok.  But day 2 dawned and  ya’ll…

I. Just. Could. Not.

I honestly have no idea why.

I had a great trip.  I won’t insult you by suggesting that I ate nothing but kale and unsalted almonds the whole week.  But I actually did pretty well.  And by ‘well’ I mean I wasn’t double dunking doughnuts in the 700 area Starbucks.  I take my victories where I can get them friends.

And I wasn’t dreading going back to the gym.  I didn’t actually even think about it.

Missing the first day was no big deal.  I’m a busy person.  I didn’t feel 100%.

Wanna know the scariest part?  Missing the second day was even easier.  I didn’t even feel the need for an excuse.

By the third day, something had to give.  I trudged through the house, retrieved my workout clothes (i.e pajamas)  and laced up my shoes.

I drove to the gym and developed a pounding headache.  It’s probably dangerous to get on the spin bike with a blinding migraine that might be a brain ailment, right? But I did.  And the pain just got worse for the next 50 minutes.  And when that workout was over, I still had a headache.  Apparently those mighty endorphins are not the miraculous things we were led to believe.  I’m convinced skipping the exercise wouldn’t have cured the headache either.  And if I had skipped class for the third time with no good excuse, how much easier would it be to skip the 4th or the 5th?  I am so thankful that my vacation from the gym was not permanent.

I see how it happens now.  Nobody plans to quit.  Nobody wakes up and says “Sure, I’ll keep paying for that membership for the next ten months but I am never going back.” Nobody buys an overpriced treadmill with the intention of using it for 6 weeks and then allowing it to fill them with guilt and shame for a year before finally sacrificing it to Craigslist.  Nobody does it on purpose.

They say (whoever ‘they’ are) that it takes 30 days to form a habit but I disagree.

I think it takes a lifetime. Because it’s only a habit until you stop doing it.

The Goal – Week 46

The Goal – Week 46

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I keep thinking this whole endeavor is going to get easier.  Or, at the very least, that it will stop being so hard.

And it’s not.

Part of this process for me is grieving the loss of my fantasy scenario.  I have to accept and make peace with the fact that there is no magical day in my future where not being or getting fat will be effortless.

This annoys me.